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Friday, February 3, 2006

This Kind of Thing was Once Cool
[transmission from... Tyler Sonnichsen]

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, lived a group of magical musicians who would leave an indelible imprint of the world of popular music. Surely, if you've taken notice of that esteemed musical work encapsulated to the right, you understand that I'm speaking of the city of Minneapolis, and the "time" being that awkward period as the mid-80's approached. Boys were gradually becoming men. The local Replacements and Husker Du's were beginning to take the indie music world by storm, and a dimunitive, superhumanly talented freak named Prince Rogers Nelson was one of the biggest stars in the world on the heels of a ridiculous self-eggrandizing film and it's outstanding accompanying soundtrack. Surely, if one Prince were to rise to the top of the world, as he did, then others would have to take the fall. And one other did.

Jesse Johnson was a good man. He once fronted a heavily influential funk-rock group called the Time that, while it wallowed in Prince's shadow for most of its existence, generated some sweet, sweet funk in the early part of the 1980's. After The Time split, Jesse formed his own group and released the opus "Jesse Johnson's Revue" in 1985. Twenty-one years later, February 1, 2006 to be exact, I spotted the man blazing across this cover in a $1.00 bin and couldn't stop laughing.

I'm not kidding. I laughed like a motherfucker and it only got louder when flipped the album over to reveal the men who Jesse Johnson brought with him when he "went there." Below you will see those five men, their signs (because, yes, the liner notes listed their astrological orientations) and their accompanying stories, which I am about to fabricate. Enjoy.

The group's lone Virgo (though certainly not a virgin if you catch my drift), spent most of his life trying to find both Nick Cave and Little Richard, of whom he was the anorexic love-child. He moved to Terre Haute, IN and started a non-profit. Something about the moon.
An avowed Aquarius, Mark has actually been living in your garage for the last two weeks. You told yourself that you'd clean out that area behind the trash bins, but those leaves make a fine bed for the man who spent years battling Tim "The Man" Bradley for keyboard supremacy.
Hey, your little brother ever been molested by a guitarist born under Leo? No? Ask again in...five minutes. ZEBRA TIE!!!
"Okay, are you going to take the goddamn photo or not? No, I WILL NOT put the smoke out. It's either I smoke in the photo or I'm not in the photo. I mean, I have to keep the beat for Jesse, man! Yeah, and I know that Mark's an aquarius, too. Have him tell that to my killer 'stache and rippling chest hair." - something Bobby Vandell should have been saying.
Little did this Leo bassist know that while he never quite resurfaced, his hair would a full decade later. I think he said it best: "Please don't tell Jesse I'm blind. Without him, I'm nothing."

You may ask if I'm actually listened to this yet. The answer is no. I didn't spend that hard-earned dollar on this (actually, it was more like 70 cents, the store was having a sale) for the depth of such "jams" (nowhere are the tracks referred to anything but as such) as "Be Your Man" and "Let's Have Some Fun." Clearly, "Let's Go Crazy" had already been taken. Thank you, Jesse Johnson's Revue, for reminding us how much more there is to music than music itself. Stay tuned for more classic forgotten vinyl treasures.
Fri, February 3, 2006 | link

Monday, January 30, 2006

The 60 Greatest Punk Bands
[transmission from... Tyler Sonnichsen]

In my constant quest to outnerd all of the hipster publications, my friends, and even myself, I have put together this list during several boring Metro rides to and from work. I think that most genres of music deserve equal attention and respect, but at the end of the day for me, I’m not going to lie- there’s nothing quite like a solid, three-chord punk song. Taking all of that into consideration, the following list was originally going to be something like 25, but it poured over into sixty because so many bands that I really couldn’t see excluded altogether that fell all the way up the list. And, inevitably, I had to exert my own views on what bands I ultimately judged as “punk.” Ultimately, to make things simpler, I decided to exclude all the great bands who fell in with the said crowd but ultimately transcended what was accepted as ‘punk’ (Talking Heads, Television, The Fall, The Replacements, Sonic Youth, Public Image, Ltd., etc.). Also excluded were the bands whose attitudes were unquestionably punk as fuck but would have thrown things off a bit (Violent Femmes, The Pogues) as well as those awesome denizens of rhythmic post-punk abrasiveness Joy Division and Gang of Four. And, sorry to the founding fathers/mothers of punk, but what most people consider “proto” was also hard to factor in (cya, Velvet Underground, Stooges, MC5, New York Dolls, and Patti Smith). I also dropped Nirvana and other so-labeled “grunge” acts because, well, it's somewhat complicated, but as grunge went, it's hard to put them in the same league as a lot of these bands, though Soundgarden, Mudhoney, et al deserve just as much respect. Ska bands, too, though all of the best bands have played traditional stuff more in line with ska's second wave (The Specials, The Slackers, The Toasters, Hepcat, etc.). I think I got a vast majority of the bands that people are going to be asking “Where were ______?”

So here’s what I did judge the bands on- the overall quality of their music, obviously (timelessness, innovation, and simply how it rocks), the polarizing or mobilizing effect of their music or message, their commitment (while they were together, regardless of whether they existed for 2 years like #9 or others, or twenty years like #17 and others), how many bands have ripped off their music, and many other minor things. Without further ado, I give you, my list of the 60 Greatest Punk Bands of All Time.
  1. The Clash (London)
  2. Ramones (Queens)
  3. Bad Brains (Washington DC)
  4. The Damned (London)
  5. Black Flag (Los Angeles)
  6. Minutemen (San Pedro, CA)
  7. Minor Threat (Washington, DC)
  8. Descendents (LA)
  9. Operation Ivy (Berkeley, CA)
  10. Buzzcocks (Manchester)
  11. Misfits (Lodi, NJ)
  12. Sex Pistols (London)
  13. Dead Kennedys (San Francisco)
  14. Fugazi (Washington, DC)
  15. Wire (London)
  16. Sick of It All (NYC)
  17. Husker Du (Minneapolis)
  18. Mission of Burma (Boston)
  19. Suicidal Tendencies (Venice, CA)
  20. The Germs (LA)
  21. NOFX (Berkeley, CA)
  22. Jawbox (Washington, DC)
  23. Rancid (Berkeley, CA)
  24. Screeching Weasel (Chicago)
  25. Converge (Boston)
  26. Refused (Stockholm)
  27. Jawbreaker (San Francisco)
  28. Bouncing Souls (Trenton, NJ)
  29. X (Los Angeles)
  30. Richard Hell & the Voidoids (NYC)
  31. Pennywise (Hermosa Beach, CA)
  32. Meat Puppets (Tucson)
  33. Green Day (Berkeley, CA)
  34. Bad Religion (Los Angeles)
  35. Agnostic Front (NYC)
  36. Government Issue (Washington, DC)
  37. Crass (UK)
  38. Circle Jerks (LA)
  39. Reagan Youth (NYC)
  40. Angry Samoans (Van Nuys, CA)
  41. Dropkick Murphy’s (Boston)
  42. Dinosaur Jr. (Amherst, MA)
  43. 7 Seconds (Las Vegas)
  44. Rites of Spring (Washington, DC)
  45. Dwarves (Chicago)
  46. Hot Water Music (Gainesville, FL)
  47. Ataque 77 (Buenos Aires)
  48. Stiff Little Fingers (Belfast)
  49. Gorilla Biscuits (NYC)
  50. Adolescents (LA)
  51. Television Personalities (UK)
  52. Cocksparrer (London)
  53. Vandals (Huntington Beach, CA)
  54. At the Drive-In (El Paso)
  55. Social Distortion (LA)
  56. Exploited (Edinburgh)
  57. UK Subs (England)
  58. Dead Boys (Cleveland)
  59. Braid (Chicago)
  60. The Business (London)
Write me at tyler [at] tdcpresents [dot] com with any and all comments and opinions. I'll air your grievances on the site soon, I promise.
Mon, January 30, 2006 | link


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Updated 11.24.08

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Want to help bring THE BIG TAKEOVER back, an onto the air?! How to donate and more info here.




Saturday, November 29th
NELLIE GREEN'S COMEDY
50 Maple St., Branford, CT
9pm, $8
with Davin Rosenblatt, Howie Mason, and Pat Oates! I think it's all ages. Call 203-483-8300 to make sure, and to make reservations if you want to come out!

Tuesday, December 9
LIVE HUMANS IN DC
I'm the featured artist.
Free, 7:30pm, at the Palace of Wonders. Hope you see you out!
2210 H St. NE, DC, 21+
Saturday, December 13th
LAUGHING LIZARD COMEDY
at O'Shaughnessy's
1324 King St., Alexandria
10pm, 21+
Hosted by Keith Irvin! Lineup coming soon!


Check out TDC on...

Thanks Josh!
Sign the Guestbook! (It's been there for some time, but seriously, sign it).



Watch the video for Wes Mann's "If Only You Knew" right here!

THROUGH THE WASH
What happens to common appliances and gadgets mistakenly go through the wash and dry cycle? Do they come out alive? Check out this handy site, with appearances from myself, Jake, and Aparna. Hosted by Chris and filmed my Joe "the man" Deeley.

MUZAK!?


NoFX, Dillinger 4, Teenage Bottlerocket and more at Ram's Head Live in Baltimore on Friday the 24th....

The Bouncing Souls are headlining the Black Cat on Wednesday, Oct 27th...

It's time for The Pietasters' obnoxious, drunken Halloween show at the 9:30 Club!!...

Cafe Tacuba (aka the Mexican Flaming Lips) are playing The State Theater on Sunday, 11/2...

The Gutter Twins are competing for my audience on November 7th, playing the Black Cat...

The Spinto Band will be pimpin' Moonwink at The Black Cat on Friday the 14th...

The Aquabats. The Black Cat. November 17th. Enough Said...

Robyn Hitchcock is performing I Often Dream of Trains at the Birchmere on the 18th. Ideally, Eli and I can reunite with him and have another awkward conversation about comedy...

Sondre Lerche is returning! 9:30 club on November 24th...


 

IF YOU LIVE IN THE DC AREA, HAVE A SOUL, AND ENJOY GOOD LIVE COMEDY, I highly recommend these weekly/biweekly shows.


MONDAY
11TH ST. LOUNGE
First and third mondays of every month. It's intimate, friendly, and the servers upstairs are fine. Even an audience of 10 non-comics can whip the place into a frenzy. Hosted by Lou Giglio, or Bart Voisin if he couldn't escape the calling. Oh Highland Dr, right across from the Clarendon Grill.

SPY LOUNGE
Eli "the man" Sairs and Tyler "da man" Richardson run this open mic at a bizarrely posh but still fun place right in the heart of Adam's Morgan, on 18th St. Starts around 8pm.

CHIEF IKE'S MAMBO ROOM
Run by the luminaries behind DCC4N. On Columbia Rd. right north of that intersection in Adams-Morgan.

TUESDAY
Nema is gone, but info about Takoma Station and the Library (both in Northeast) coming soon.

Wiseacre's happens on this night, out in Tyson's.


WEDNESDAY
Wiseacres will always be there, hopefully, out in Tyson's.

DR. DREMO'S IS DEAD. LONG LIVE DR. DREMO'S.

THURSDAY
College Perk
First and third Thursday of every month, this is probably the most fun you'll have at an open mic in the area. Maybe because it's a college hangout with a liquor license. 9078 Baltimore Avenue, College Park, MD


BLOG HIGHLIGHT INDEX

LOST VINYL CLASSICS
- The Korean Orphan Choir...on tour!
- Richard Simmons' illustrious recording career
- The Magic of Chet Parker and that Hammer Dulcimer
- The Magic of Jesse Johnson

SHORT FILM SHOWCASE
- Georgetown Cabaret 2007 Teaser
- Greg Pahanish: Professional Comedian [TEASER]
- Don't Fuck with Joe Deeley
- Into the Leaves!
- Tag: The Movie

INTERVIEWS
- Bobby Vandell
- Ted Leo
- On the Dead Milkmen (w/ Thoughts from Joe Jack Talcum)

MUSIC, ETC.
- Pixies, bitch!
- Ska is still Awesome
- The Official Summer 06 Mix
- Minutemen: One of the All-Time Greatest American Bands, now on DVD!
- On Erasure and other Gay Delights (but mostly Erasure)
- Living Too Late: A 2-Part Rumination
- The Best Things Never Said Onstage
- Sondre Lerche and The Spinto Band
- Top 60 Punk Bands
- The Guided By Voices drinking game!
- God is pissed at Stapp!
- Two Theories on Poison (the band)

CULTURE/COMEDY
- On "the Suck"
- Laughing Lizard Showcase's One Year Anniversary!
- On Viacom's battle with YouTube - The Ted Healy Suck Awards
- George Thorogood = Zima Drinker?
- Mitch Hedberg Tribute: One Year Later
- Norwegian death metal aka the stupidest thing ever written
- The Unseen Danger of Video Games

MOVIES
-TWS on the American Hardcore Documentary
-Spinal Tap and its importance to our generation
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
- The TDC take on "A Christmas Story"
-
SPORTS
- On San Fermin and Bullfighting
- Love from CT and the Hartford Whalers
- The Washington Capitals are Awesome
SPECIAL GUEST COLUMNS

Alex Kain
- To Those Who Blame Video Games for Anything
- Alex's Gift for Uwe Boll!
- On "Cube!"

Tyler Richardson
- If I could, i would...
- What makes Tyler Richardson happy?
- Those Risks in Everyday Life

Jermaine Fowler
- Jermaine on his Idol/Nemesis Tony DeNikos
- Tony fakes his own death!
- Denikos: the Final Chapter

Adam Crowley
- Sighting in Oklahoma

RIDICULOUSLY GOOD SONG OF THE WEEK

The Lillingtons - "Don't Trust the Humanoids"

The TDC Archive of the Greatest Things Ever Said, Ever

"Holy shit. Did we just elect a black dude president?"
 - Eric Moberg, in a text to me, 11:32 pm ET, 11/4/08

  

[Firth. It's pronounced Firth. Like the actor. Like our planet if it started with F.]
Welcome to the official TDC Productions website. Glad you could make it. Hope you enjoy yourself. If you want to check out any recent postings, just check out the archive below the blog at the bottom of this page.
If you've got anything to publish here, send it right here.

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